I don't wanna work, I wanna bang on the drum all day!

To prove how well standardized career tests work, I'm posting Karl's results. I totally think he needs to reevaluate his career goals.

1. Water Treatment Plant Operator (ooh, taking poo out of people's water)

2. Film Processor

3. Power Plant Operator (it was always his dream to emulate the great Homer Simpson)

4. Explosives Specialist (What guy doesn't want to blow shit up?)

5. Stationary Engineer (Whaaa? An enginner that doesn't move?)

6. Database Developer

7. Web Developer

8. Manufacturing Machine Operator

9. Business Systems Analyst

10. Avionics Tech

11. Video Game Developer

12. Computer Programmer

13. Multimedia Developer

14. Optical / Ophthalmic Lab Technician

15. Dental Lab Tech

16. Animator

17. Fashion Designer

18. Computer Animator

19. Graphic Designer

20. Artist

21. Upholsterer

22. Electrician

23. Medical Illustrator

24. Musical Instrument Builder and Repairer

25. Physicist

26. Environmental Engineer

27. Computer Engineer

28. Electrical Engineer

29. Biomedical Engineer

30. Film Editor

31. Computer Support Person

32. Printing Press Operator

33. Aerospace Engineer

34. Bookbinder

35. Desktop Publisher

36. Electrical Engineering Tech

37. Electronics Engineering Tech

38. Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator

39. Industrial Designer

40. Craftsperson

Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match! Find me a find! Catch me a catch!

I just took a career test. Here are the results, ranked by my interests. Some hit the nail on the head. Some really leave me wondering...

For those of you curious to do so:
-go to http://www.careercruising.com/default.asp;
-put in Username: nycareers, Password: landmark;
-take their "Career Matchmaker" questions.

1. Anthropologist

2. Website Designer

3. Sport Psychology Consultant (Huh? Being that I'm not all that athletic, and consultant is such a shady word...)

4. Lobbyist

5. Rehabilitation Counselor

6. Historian

7. Desktop Publisher

8. Humanitarian Aid Worker

9. Industrial Designer

10. Animator (Yes, of stick figures!)

11. Cartoonist / Comic Illustrator (Please refer to the detail in number 10)

12. Mediator (I already hold this job in my crazy family)

13. Interior Designer

14. Criminologist (Did I ever mention how CSI makes me cringe?)

15. Dental Assistant (Jeebus! Stick my hands in other people's mouths? I think not!)

16. Fashion Designer (I actually seriously considered this option when Karl and I moved out west)

17. Industrial-Organizational Psychologist

18. Multimedia Developer

19. Addictions Counselor (funny, I'm waiting on an acceptance letter to get this degree...)

20. Costume Designer

21. Human Resources Specialist

22. Religious Worker

23. Community Worker

24. Activist

25. Graphic Designer

26. Artist

27. Computer Animator (Karl would be so proud)

28. Psychologist

29. Print Journalist

30. Communications Specialist

31. Political Aide

32. Archivist

33. Writer

34. Public Policy Analyst

35. Exhibit Designer

36. Critic (of life?)

37. Library Technician (Is this a fancy term for librarian?)

38. Dispatcher

39. Translator (I did this one for awhile. Boy, some funny mistranslation stories to tell...)

40. Market Research Analyst

Virtual Reality Insanity

You would never know this, but I have issues with reality television. Yes, I have watched my fair share of trash. I remember the year Karl and I were glued in front of the television to watch "I Want to Be a Hilton" and "Average Joe 3: The Joes Strike Back." Christi had me addicted to the first season of "The Apprentice." I also harbor the guilt of watching every show from the first season of "My Super Sweet 16" (this was a low point in my life physically, emotionally, educationally, and psychologically).

Of course, loosely relating to Kenneth Burke, what is "reality"? Our terministic screen messes with reality since it's perceived in so many facets. What really happened? Did it really happen? With reality television, the wonders of editing can make the sweetest person look like a bitch. My favorite editing snafu as of late was a BBC special on Queen Elizabeth II. The dear Queen was in a photo shoot with famed photographer Annie Leibowitz. The special shows the Queen leaving the shoot in quite a huff, appearing to be rather ticked with Leibowitz. The BBC apologized to the Queen for misrepresentation in editing. So what happened?

Anyway, back to the gripe of reality television. CBS will be airing a program called "Kid Nation." My primary gripe with this is that, at least in my silly brain, has a scary resemblance to "Lord of the Flies." My other weak question: what good can come of this? Will I totally misinterpret this show like I did with "Dancing with the Stars"? I was sure "Stars" was too absurd and bound to flop. Oh, how wrong am I, five seasons later?

Not yet a girl gone wild, not yet sedate

Ever since Karl and I established a land line, we've been getting telemarketing calls just like the rest of the world. Our cell phones still serve as the catch-and-release tags for our family members. On our land line, we've gotten the regular calls for steam cleaning (not our responsibility, living in an apartment), refinancing our mortgage (owning a house out here... we'd have to give up a few organs and then some for a down payment), and for vacations (stupid Redondo Beach hotel selling our information). The best call, though, came from the esteemed organization of Girls Gone Wild, asking to talk to Karl...

This takes me back to when Karl and I first met. One of our first dates was to a GameCube launch party in Atlanta. He failed to inform me that it was sponsored by Maxim. As we enter, there are scantily-clad girls draped over large-screen televisions. The tragedy of the situation was that they were receiving no attention. At all. All but two of the party attendees (being Heidi and myself) were addicted to playing preview games and talking about graphics.

But I'm still wondering about Girls Gone Wild... and being in Los Angeles, you never know...